The child I was would be worried when it saw the adult I have become. Not that I am an adult yet, but lawfully I am. But that's another discussion.
When I was a child I was very naive and dependent on everybody around me. I trusted my parents and brother for everything. I almost never told any lies and I always felt very guilty when I did something wrong. I was always a very vocal Christian, as young as I was (also not always, it was phase in my life that I know the causes for). I was once very friendly and unshy, but that all changed later on and for a large part of my childhood it remained so.
As my mother married this man he so-to-say wrecked my life, my childhood. He changed this naive and happy kid into this depressed and negative thing that I became. It lasted six years from grade two until grade eight, and now in my last year of school where I am now, I can happily say that that has changed.
Today I am the vocal and friendly kid I once was, but only in the foundation. I am no longer vocal about Christianity as such, but more about positivity, happiness, and so on. I love talking to my friends and helping them through bad times. I became a very non-naive person; I challenge everything. As I am still in development, I trust I will keep on changing and always alter my life's road to change for the better of the possibilities.
I am non-religious, non-naive, yet friendly and social. I really like where I am and I can see success in my future. I know I will be happy; that's all I need to be.
I sometimes look back at the childhood that was taken away from me as an innocent child and feel a bit sad, which is good. I realize my past; I don't pretend it was different. But then I am so glad that everything bad that happened was so physical and it is over now, and through the years I have grown emotionally to take the emotional scars and turn them into experiences that I can fall back on in the simplest and toughest challenges that life gives me everyday. I am having the first part of adulthood much easier than most of my friends who are still trying to figure themselves out and who stare blindly at their problems and don't know how to process it and make the best of it. I am today a very emotionally stable person. I can remember how emotional I could get in the previous years.
The child of my childhood, with his naive and innocent personality, who thought he knew everything, will look on me and think I am a failure. Obviously, because I don't believe the things that I have believed as a child and I live my life differently. But it doesn't mean anything. I know I made the right decisions and I am satisfied with what I have become, if I had to look back onto the child I was.
We sometimes attribute our emotional instability or unhappiness to stuff that happened in our past, when it couldn't be more untrue. Being happy is a choice. It takes time to reshuffle your environment and your thoughts, but if you decide you will be happy, you will be it more and more every second since you've decided it.
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